We all dream of eternal happiness and are constantly measuring our happiness by comparing our relationships to what our ideal relationship expectations are.― Albert Camus once said“You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life.”
So what can we do to improve our happiness in our relationship?Here are nine tips that you can remember the next time you notice yourself feeling unhappy.
1. Focus on what you love about your partner.
This does not mean you should turn a blind eye and ignore their faults and things your partner does that annoy you. On the contrary, you should always be aware of your feelings towards them and your relationship to ensure it is healthy and you are happy. Then, when you are confident in your commitment to being in a happier relationship with your partner, it can help you glide through petty irritations if you both keep your focus on the things your love rather than the irritations.
2. Give your partner space while making yourself available.
Giving your significant other space means you respect their needs and you are attuned without being intrusive. However, that doesn’t mean that you should avoid them. On the contrary, a good step towards a happier relationship is to ensure they know you are there when they need something or someone to talk to.
3. Prioritise your needs
It can be really easy to abandon our needs and lose ourselves in our relationship. Of course, we prioritise our partners, but we need to be mindful to take needs seriously. By focusing on yourself and ensuring you are happy and taken care of, you can have a happier relationship well.
4. Don’t take it personally if your partner doesn’t want to talk about their feelings
Talking about your emotions can be hard, and expressing them can be downright challenging. We all mask our feelings through smiles, anger, or by joking around.When people feel that their partner is uninterested in talking about their feeling, it can be confusing. Try not to take this personally.They may feel shy, overwhelmed or embarrassed. Give them the time they need. Using patience, you can help your partner understand that talking to you about their emotions is okay and they are safe. Allowing yourselves to be vulnerable will improve this area of communication between you.
5. Be present, not distracted.
When you’re with your partner, focus on being present.Being present and in the moment by listening to what your partner has to say is a life skill we all need. When we’re not thinking about our needs or problems, we can focus on the other person and be there for them. We can ensure they know their importance to us and show them that we are interested and want to be there for them.
6. Be honest
Sometimes it can be easy to sacrifice things you may want or like for the person you care about. But your needs are just as important. Your needs are equally important in your relationship, so ensure you get equal care! Being honest with one another makes it easier to have a fulfilling relationship. With honesty, the relationship will work. Therefore, honesty is key to a healthy and fulfilling relationship.
7. Ditch expectations
One of my favourite things to say about relationships is this: Expectation is the mother of disappointment.Too often, when we get into long-term relationships, we begin to expect things from our partners. For example, they take the puppy out every morning, so we come to expect it. We do the dishes every evening, so they start to expect us to.This is detrimental to your long-term happiness. If you want to be happy, get rid of the expectations. It doesn’t matter how often your partner does something. You should be pleased and excited whenever they do it. No one owes each other anything (even in relationships), and if you’ve found someone who does certain things because they care and love you, you are fortunate.By ditching the expectations, you’ll make them feel more valued and change your view to look at the positive aspects of your love naturally.
8. Prioritise intimacy (not just sex)
The key to having a happy relationship is to have fun! Fun can increase intimacy and bring focus, engagement, and laughter into your life. A relationship needs fun, not just between you two, but also by spending time with other people socially. It’s essential to spend quality time together doing something you enjoy. Take a walk, work out together, take up a new hobby or activity together, or find an activity you and your spouse can do after work hours. Make new memories by having fun!
If your happiness is affected by your relationship, and you’ve tried these tips, but they don’t seem to make much of a difference, I recommend getting in touch with me.I have various packages available for couples and would love to have a chat to see if your relationship might benefit.
9. Prioritise having fun
Intimacy is not just sex. Intimacy is also those moments when we feel connected with our partner—laughing together, cuddling up on the sofa, having a quiet candlelight dinner for two at home. Get into the habit of making it your priority to create more of these moments. Don’t be that couple who feels happy together but lets sex fall by the wayside. Instead, healthy, happy couples realise that their physical connection is as important as their emotional one. Don’t forget that your physical bonding helps makes everything else flow. So remember to prioritise sex to keep yourselves connected.